If you don’t control your mind, someone else will.
- John Allston
Narcissists want the target under their control. Before having this, however, the narcissist will need to draw the target into their sphere of influence. They achieve this in a multitude of ways, with the two most common being sanctioned superiority and charm.
If the narcissist is a parent or in management, then their task becomes much easier. When in a natural position of power, the narcissist is seen by the target as both superior and as a source of structure and guidance. Having sanctioned control over another human being is extremely helpful for the narcissist; it’s the easiest way to get free supply. Many parents unwittingly do this, keeping their children trapped in a cage of guilt and manipulation so that they don’t stray too far away from them. It’s important to note that such parents don’t all have narcissistic personality disorder, but this tendency in a parent is narcissistic.
Further to their sanctioned position of power, the narcissist will assert their dominance by ridiculing and shaming those beneath them and acting shameless. This strategy helps add to the aura that the narcissist is of h...
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