Why The Eyes Of A Narcissist And Psychopath Look Dead

What lies behind that eerie sense of being watched when it comes to a narcissist or psychopath?

Why the eyes of a narcissist or psychopath appear dead

What gives eyes a sense of feeling, warmth and life is the True Self. Eyes that look alive have ‘soul’. In such cases, a person is aligned within, and in harmony with their emotional flow. Narcissists and psychopaths are alienated from this part of themselves, so they try to emulate the expression of their soul instead.

Almost everyone can sense the fakeness behind the narcissist and psychopath’s feeble attempts at exhibiting humanity. This is called the ‘uncanny valley’. Narcissists and psychopaths usually get the benefit of the doubt, because the idea that someone is not connected to their soul, that they are in fact more robot than human when it comes to soul connection, is terrifying to admit.

When The Eyes Die

‘Dead eyes’ is a dissociative state, where a person disconnects from their True Self and directs their focus toward their outer environment, a person of interest, or a person of potential threat. This leads to a concentration of consciousness away from the body and into the head, or rather, third eye.

This has the following effects:

  • Emotions are no longer felt, which removes any feeling of vulnerability.

  • A birds-eye view effect is created, where a person feels like they are looking out at the world/person from a safe place.

  • A container of dominance is created, making others feel like they are exposed, vulnerable, and needing to be on the defence.

You can see this in a person who is otherwise engaged until they feel triggered by the other person, wherein they shut off their emotions and their eyes ‘turn dead’.

Same Dynamic, Many Reasons

Dead eyes is a protective mechanism for people who carry trauma, and is not exclusive to narcissists and psychopaths. It can be used defensively when a person feels engulfed, or in an offensive manner when a person is curious or aroused by another person.

This is where we get into psychopathy. Clearly narcissists and psychopaths do not want to be vulnerable, while they do want others to be vulnerable so they can get their way or gain narcissistic supply. It is not so much the dynamic itself, but the intention behind it.

Schizoids also activate this mechanism, as well as those with avoidant personality. But keep in mind the person may be deeply traumatised, and dissociates their emotions to feel temporarily safe and protected.


For a complete resource on narcissism and guide to narcissistic abuse recovery, check out How To Kill A Narcissist.